Quarantine 2020 Entry #1

I've noticed, when looking back at older posts than I've here, how appreciative I am of having written it no matter how dreadful many of them are to read today. Maybe almost as potent as distinct memories triggered from the olfactory go. Just a bit sweeter and less maniacal as you try so hard to grasp onto them stronger than just the millisecond of mist. Slipping, fleeting. 

Was that cringey? Yeah, well

So here I am chronicling what little of it I probably will. I hope it's the last I'll be mentioning in detail because over 5 weeks in cumbersome is never going to be the word to best describe the globe's sentiment so far. 

It began with increasingly frightful reports of rising deaths overseas. A week before my time of quarantine I began to wonder why my place of work hadn't already begun following suit to announce its closure until further notice like the many others steadily announced. I recalled the wise practicality of already implemented protective measures like face masks into its social sphere in most of northeast Asia. We shake our hands here. I grew up in the default of hands clasped as proper greetings (screw your namaste shirts). Fricken hugs and air kisses for women here. Just give me a fist bump instead, please. Or wave without making it awkward that I didn't go for the expected customary hug. These things have and will always be unnatural to me.

Anyway, I wish face masks were socially acceptable before this mess. I even bought one years ago, primarily for mitigating minor allergic reactions to working around dust at home, dug it back up for now. After this merica no less will once again be deterred by it due to its traumatic introduction and association to a "covid mask" more or less. 

The first two weeks were unbearable. Every day felt like 2 and half. Everyone now recalls March being the longest year err... month ever. Now it's nearing the end of April. I suppose we passed our primary shock to systems, slowly but surely going into silent acceptance that this is going to be months even dare say years.. 

I have nothing else to say. An accurate reflection of the oddest times of my life. Going to go back to staring out my window.

My First BLUE Liquid Lipstick - LA Splash

What are liquid lipsticks? Many beauty enthusiasts have invariably began that explanation with, "if you've been living under a rock, then ..." and I know all about living under a rock. 

I can't tell you how many stories or celebrities or t.v. shows friends have mentioned that I've always, to their genuine shock, responded "oh, I think I haven't heard of that/them." For the better first few years of my life as the very first offspring to newly situated dreamer parents, I've definitely lived under a rock. 

However, as far as these lipstick products go I think I've been waiting for its existence almost forever.

I began this blog including a short description of my hesitation on beauty products, on how I once internalized the ridiculous youthful teenaged misogynist culture of "make up is too girly for me! I'm one of the guys!" 

Fast forwarding to today, neglecting to mention the many vital experiences of milestones and self-reflections required to grow out of that silly thinking for the sake of a succinct post (maybe for another time), I own more liquid lipstick products than I do other cosmetic products. I don't even yet own a foundation.

Liquid lipsticks are essentially shapeless lipsticks in liquid formation generally packaged to take space in a long, slim hollow cylindrical prism container. Like most glass lip gloss packaging, twisting off the top a spongy doe foot applicator is found on that end to precisely slather on the substance.

What liquid lipsticks are especially popular for is its trendy matte-ifying, touch-proof formula. What some buyers also do not know is that not all liquid lipsticks are made the same, obviously, but for different reasons, because mind you not all are made kiss-proof or even dry to a matte finish. Some are vegan (free of animal derived substances), some are not. Some are even versatile and safe to wear as an eyeliner!

My favorite ones, my exclusive purchases, must come in transfer-free formula. Why? I have strayed from lipstick purchases in the past because of its required maintenance and constant mirror-gazing to check up on its wear and that it hasn't unintentionally smeared across my face like the Joker. Too much work for one that rather spend her time on other more pressing matters. Transfer-proof and long wearing? MangoJuiceBox approved. 

I find liquid lipsticks to be a lot more opaque, almost like a thick layer of paint pigment, upon application than traditional lipsticks. Because of pigmented lips, what I realized recently to be a ring of deeper skin shade from near both the vermillion borders toward mid-body of my lips, conventional bullet lipsticks smeared shades lighter and sheerer. Not only by Eurocentric models with near pale pinky lips but even by the shade on the bullet itself. False marketing, I'd say, and I never returned to the world of lip products. 

That is until I found a video showing a buyer pressing her hand against her very opaque liquid lipstick stained lips to reveal a full lack of transfer. Magic to my starry eyes.

My first biggest purchase was bound to happen last June when I spotted what was at the time the most eclectic collection of lipstick colors ever - with blue and green lipstick. Here in this post you'll find lip swatches of the following lipsticks I bought over two separate transactions almost a week apart. Be sure to click "Read more" below for it!

Flaming Burritos - Mexican Food Enthusiast

Located just a few blocks, approximately 10 irregular ones, from my last mini restaurant review, closer to a mini plaza and more effortful and inviting area, we venture off to an authentic Tex-Mexican restaurant by the name of Flaming Burritos! 

Before visiting, mind you I only really had Taco Bell (not an actual semblance of real Mexican eats at all). Naturally, it was a belly-filling surprise to find almost half the remaining burrito in a to-go bag at the end of my time spent there. Perhaps, I should've taken the inviting, cartoony-like personified burrito caricature as their logo more seriously than intended (you see here in the middle of their indoor BYOB Corona ad). 

Honestly, the reason I return is for their complimentary salsa + chips. Their salsa dip is AMAZING. None of that disingenuous bottled salsa and conservatives mess they feed you elsewhere. Scents of savory, freshly chopped ingredients such as the oozing tomatoes, cilantro, most specifically the flaming aspect of it as jalapeños makes quite the appetizer itself - and it's free. That satisfies my frugal-with-standards ass. They even refill this if your order has not yet arrived, or honestly for the hell of it if you wished - even after the end of your meal. So thoughtful! And absolutely delicious. This has been the deciding factor a number of times when I had the inevitable and terrifying back-and-forth of but where do YOU want to eat? // Idk, you?? // I just said I don't know??? 

They regularly have lunch menus and other special offers during the week, sometimes weekend. Oh, and they're BYOB, they'll provide an ice bucket for you. We bought a very large cheap wine, err, jug, and they found a way to keep it cool with smiles.

My favorite meal would have to be their Tex-Mex Grilled Chicken Taco Salad, fills me up each time. Again, did not get a chance nor thought to snap a photo. My hunger takes over and that's okay. They include freshly cut guacamole for no extra charge (it is invariably part of this dish with a protein of your choice, even vegan if you'd like), too, along with a few pieces of chips propped up surrounding the inner plate - what a dish.

In the end, this is just as an inviting place as any other, maybe more, because of their authentic decor (wish I snapped a few pictures but I like to take in the environment without being interrupted by the thought of recording it all down for any reason - all the more better of an experience frankly), very attentive and kind servers, freshness, service, and more! You can catch 'em at FlamingBurritoUnionCity.com! 

Thank you for taking the time to read, and your appreciated support!

Let's go to Garbanzo's!

Where do I start?!

Walking aimlessly around the edge of two cities one day where Union City and Weehawken meet on Park Ave., I spot an inconspicuous ambience for a seemingly inviting homey restaurant. 

GARBANZO. 

"Babe, that place looks cute!" 

I peak in from across the street on Union City ground, carefully cross the street now on Weehawken to grab their menu from their lowly gated outdoor seating area for a rapid glance. The inside and decor reminds me of a Starbucks. I sort of see minimalist chic pea decorations intricately stuffed in small clear vases/glasses on white table runners of small brown tables (at that time). I skim the menu, and shove it in my bag for later detailed choosing, along with later storing it in my boyfriend's top drawer of other menus for quick access to our stack of emergency-places-to-call-for-munchies. We walk back to the edge of U.C. again then to my car. 

I remember finally ordering in one existential Sunday afternoon. Got a rice bowl and some pita chips with salsa. Passed by taste test but testing out a new restaurant, at least for a introverted homebody, probably was not the best idea. At the time, it worked, especially for a dreadful day such as Pre-Monday.

Fast forward to weeks later, again walking aimlessly to recover from the regular drudgery of work in the same area, the mood was right with a mellow dusky atmosphere, a goldilocks weather kinda day, inspiring, comfortable. We saunter inside.

We are met with Aradhna, (please forgive my spelling!) the co-owner of what we later found out after many successful repeated visits of two other restaurants in the neighborhood. I purchase my now ultimate favorite dish during their lunch hour ($1 off regular menu + complimentary bottled drink) the Falafel Platter. Absolutely delicious! I wish I had a photo but I also wanted to devour my meal after splitting and spreading out the falafel pieces all over my dish. And it felt so instagrammy; maybe next time. [Edit: 1/21/16 added photos]

The Falafel Platter comes with fresh shepard salad (cucumbers, mixed romaine lettuce?, diced tomatoes, and light translucent dressing), a side of grilled vegetables (such as a slice of red bell pepper, zucchini, etc.), rice of your choice (they had vermicelli but I substituted it for brown rice - so well done, too!), 4 warm pita bread halves, a dressing of choice (take the garlic one, so light!), and 6 meatball sized fried falafel pieces. I always ask for a bottle of their succulent Red Wine Vinegar for added dressing; I had this included in a rice bowl in my delivery last time and my boyfriend's order was another rice bowl so I stole some of his the first time we dined in. I am telling you - the red wine vinegar added SO MUCH FLAVOR with practically no added salt. (I have to get the ingredients though).

You are also greeted with a glass bottle of water the shape of a single 750mL wine bottle to pour refills into your clear mason jar-coffee-like matching cups while you await your order. As a restaurant that participates in BYOB (yaaas), they also immediately prepare an ice bucket upon spotting your byob.

I don't want to be superfluous on information to this post, but I have to say, I've been meaning to share my experience with this restaurant for the longest. We have been visiting for over a year now since our lucky discovery. The owner has a son that pops by every now and then after school to grab a dollar or so from the register to, of course, buy some munchies nearby. We've seen her husband in passing, too, whom I believe manages the second of their three restaurants very few blocks down the same intersecting road off of Park Ave on 38th st. near Union City's City Hall called the Burrito Joint. Plain YUM. I am obsessed with Mexican cuisine.

So much for a rapid review, hah! I wanted to emulate a similar experience via text as I had in person. It truly is such a lovely place and has been slightly updated/altered every now and then, such as the adorable back faux bar area and their banner outside. Oh! They also have outdoor seating through the back behind their kitchen! Has a lovely summer bbq feel with another faux bar area to greet you!

 


I truly recommend you take a visit especially if you enjoy vegan or vegetarian dishes, and a fairly intimate atmosphere. I have yet to try their other meals, it is how much I truly love their falafel platter. I've also mused the idea of going vegan for health reasons, not so much for its now trendiness, and this spot just might make than transition actually happen - and with impeccable taste!

Thanks for reading, guys! Enjoy!!

Preliminaries #comingsoon #maybe

I’ve been meaning to write more but unable to find motivation with crippling flare ups of anxiety and depression.

Here is a relatively soothing photo I found in my gallery. I adore aesthetically pleasing anything. I find it sometimes in seemingly mundane objects/views/quick glances.  

If anyone knows me well (which is rightfully no one but I atm,) I adore and support @nickiminaj fiercely. I very recently bought her #Minajesty perfume I eagerly wear almost every chance. Interested in purchasing the other scents if available! I finally chanced upon her #MyxFusions in Moscato + Peach (could not locate her new Sangria to my deep dismay). Sure only 5.5% alcohol content (I primarily roll with Bombay gin + lemonade nowadays), but only 140 calories per 6.4 fl oz which is exactly the size of the bottle I currently proudly show having up here.

Some moscatos can be dry to my taste and slightly bland, even though they are one of the sweetest wines. This one, however, was pure sweet nectar goodness! I absolutely can not stand dry drinks nor beers (I just don’t get it; life’s short, drink something that treats you well in the tastebuds with a similar effect) so this is very refreshing! The beautiful classy brand decal and enticing deep blue opaque silhouette of a personal sized glass packaging is hard to put down and hard not to stare at it in appreciation after every gulp. Very pleasing to the eye, tounge, and spirit 💕


Drink Responsibly!

The original intended purpose of Sirius Eye derived from something I am not supposed to feel ashamed of, but do. It is from a liquid lipstick shade by LaSplash called, Sirius (now called Deadly Nightshade I believe due to avoiding copyright infringement issues). I thought nothing of the name but more of the appearance of this seemingly deep navy blue lip. As with most of my try-ons, I took a selfie with it (not one above). I felt as fierce and subtle (how? I just did B] ) as my blossoming self back in high school senior year. I thought to myself, “Wuuuuht, this is ME” I proverbially waved at my once curious, thoughtful, contented teenaged self, wanted to have a conversation with her like Garnet, and labor to bridge the gap I had somehow left so so sooo long ago. 

I am nervous as hell typing and writing under this blog. I’ve hesitated to think up a wonderful follow up post. I am not ashamed of that though *disappointed side eye to self*, because I’ve always been like that (flawed perfectionist), at least the woman I thought I was back then. I’m not too far along from that wide-eyed innocent, seemingly bright girl, but life… became life, life unfolded in such arrays and I disappointed her severely. It feels like eons ago.

I want to talk about what I might to do this page, because I don’t want to know, I don’t want the reader nor I to know. I want it to grow with you reading me as I grow with myself and my inescapable surroundings. Like the life of a vine crawling up a beanstalk to whoknowswhereland.

I know I’m sounding way more “ethereal” than I should, but who cares. I want to explore myself again (like a never-ending story) and I hope this works. I am not sure if I am doing the right thing “going back” then progressing, or if I was always supposed to do this, orrr if any of this will even be anything worth anyone else’s time like I think it is.

So, let’s get back to why I am ashamed. It’s all over conscious tumblr - my own internalized misogyny. That a woman enjoying/wearing makeup was lesser than the rest us. I feel terribly uncomfortable at times when I do have a full faced/or subtle just-concealer look. That someone would sneer or whisper on how uneducated I might be, how vain I am, that I might be promiscuous, or silly, or… it goes on so far down that shit rabbit hole I never signed up for. I am even more ashamed of ever having internalized that in my life. I am working out of that as efficiently and effectively as I can. So I wore it with pride out on a banquet this month. I received confused stares, it’s cool. You know the old overused adage, people hate/fear what they don’t understand.

The shade is named after the brightest star in our naked view of the cosmos (I think to fact check this), Sirius. The project that alerted me to my “eye” on detail was my report on Athena, the wise Greek mythological (?) goddess, also referred or translated as “the bright-eyed.” Do you, maybe, see a connection? Might be obvious, or not, idk!

I was smitten with her, the color, my love for the cosmos, and wisdom (something I feel is unattainable, too overly desired by me perhaps). I know it may sound so damn cheesy but it sort of encompasses my love for contemplation, for life, for the stars, and everything else I can’t seem to remember to mention and why this post seems to be dragging.

I also know I sound very doubtful in most of my speech (trust me, I am not that way in person, no one would hire me if that’s the case, and integrity in workplaces is very very essential, but then there’s capitalism and let’s not sway that far for now). And sometimes, I find strength in something so out of whack? if you will, I honestly don’t know why (figures huh).

Most of my actual following posts will probably involve, to simply put, reviews of restaurants, cosmetic items, lip swatches for someone of my olive complexion and pigmented lips that always seem to distort what the color actually looks like intended for a fairer person, certain experiences, quick or thought-out reflections, and maybe posts about life (idk probably not) with selfies or my sad attempt to be an artsy “photographer”, etc. etc. etc. etccc. A lot of this will still be a reflection of my self, at least in that moment in time or longer considering my devotion to what is discussed.

Again, I have no idea where this may or may not take me but I am excited to feel where it might. That’s right, the possibility that it so weakly might succeed (in my terms, not so much monetary), fuels me. I’m going to hit post with one eye shut maybe kinda twitching and a twisted pout. (Thank you, nonexistent reader).

I preferred and still prefer to keep experiences to myself. It contains legitimacy without fear of judgement, rejection and outside bias. True indulgence, feeding the self. I’ve always been a private person, still am. Cozying up to the sweetest solace.

However, I’ve had this seemingly strange and maybe even out of character desire to share very few of those collective on-goings to select audiences. When I mean collective, I mean relate-able as inconspicuous as my personality might be to my outsiders.

Inspired by a mythical goddess I once studied, by the brightest celestial object within our visible stratosphere of the cosmological heavens, by a desire to impart my own complimentary metaphorical sphere of visibility, perhaps also by the inescapable, inherent human will to connect to another being - welcome to my Sirius Eye.